In the In-Between: Trusting Life When Nothing Feels Certain

In these in-between times, it is easy to question where we are going, especially when our path does not match the templates we were given. But maybe that quiet “no” to systems, roles, or rhythms that feel off is not resistance, but guidance. Maybe it is a sacred compass pointing us back to what is really true.

Choosing to honor our energy, our truth, and our boundaries, even when it leads to uncertainty, can feel shaky. There is no map for this kind of process. Only the subtle inner signals that speak through our bodies, our longings, our discomfort. And some days, those signals get clouded by fear or numbness.

Our nervous system, shaped by past wounds and the world around us, might say: “This isn’t safe. Go back to what you know.” That is often a sign of how deeply we are changing. It is what happens when we begin to move toward something more alive, more honest and start loosening the roles and identities we once relied on to stay safe.

The Healing Emerging in Struggle

When we step away from what numbed us, for example, from roles, patterns, people or systems that drained our energy and spirit, we often enter unfamiliar ground. There may be uncertainty, questions without answers, or tender inner parts of ourselves coming to the surface that were never allowed to feel, to rest, to simply be.

Healing is not a straight line. It moves in cycles. It asks for presence, not performance. For slowness, softness, and the space to meet ourselves without needing to fix anything.

We might not have the words for what we are feeling, but our body knows. Somewhere deep inside, we are the first to say no in our lineage. The first to choose something different. To lean into meeting our feelings instead of coping and performing.

That is more than courageous. And of course we feel tired or confronted with doubt. Sometimes, the pull to go back to what once felt “safe” can feel strong. Many of us live in the space between: “I can’t go back,” and “I don’t know how to go forward.” And in this tender, in-between place, old survival strategies may try to take over, like the urge to fix, to please, to control, or to give up.

But what if this is not a problem to solve, but a space to soften into? A place to breathe through. To feel. To let what is real be heard, even if clarity has not fully arrived yet.

Holding Fear Without Betraying Our Truth

Many of us did not grow up knowing how to listen to our truth. We were shaped to prioritize safety, belonging, and survival over our authenticity. We learned to adjust: to fit in, to avoid conflict, to keep the peace even if it meant suppressing our needs, emotions, or sense of self.

For many of us, truth does not feel like clarity or certainty, at least not at first. Instead, it often brings up fear: fear of rejection, of being too much, of not being safe or welcome. That is why the most honest choices can also feel like the scariest ones. Because for many of us, choosing what is real means stepping beyond what we have always known.

It means meeting the parts of ourselves that were never allowed to fully exist, the parts that were taught to hide, to perform, to please.

Real courage is not about having no fear. It is about staying with ourselves in spite of it. It is about holding fear without collapsing into it. It is about honoring what feels messy, uncertain, and alive.

Being with what is without trying to fix or flee, can ground us into something real. And in times like these, when illusion is everywhere, realness is what we need the most.

When Our Growth Challenges Others

Sometimes, what makes the in-between even harder is not just our own fear, but the fear of those around us. Friends, family, or partners might not understand the changes we are going through. They may question our choices, minimize our feelings, or try to pull us back toward who we used to be. Often this happens because our growth can feel unfamiliar or even threatening to them, if they are still living within old survival patterns.

This can make the path feel especially lonely. Many of us long to be met in our vulnerability, to be seen, supported, and understood, but instead encounter silence, resistance, or even pressure to stay the same. And when our own inner world already feels shaky, this lack of external support can increase our doubt and disorientation.

If you are feeling this, please know: it makes sense. You are not too much, too sensitive, or too different, you are just moving in a direction that others may not be ready to go. Their reactions are often shaped by their own nervous systems, unhealed pain, and unmet needs. And while it is okay to grieve the support you wish you had, it is also okay to protect the parts of you that are growing. You are allowed to honor your process gently, at your own pace, even when others do not (yet) understand. There is nothing wrong with you, you are just learning to live in alignment with your truth in a world that often asks us to abandon it. Choosing presence, rest, and realness in systems built on performance and pressure is a deeply different way of being.

You are Not Broken, You are in Transition

Some of us are walking through this in-between with no one to talk to. No map. No guidance. Just the quiet ache of wondering: Am I the only one struggling this much?

You are not. Even if it feels like everyone else has it together. Even if you are the one sitting on the floor, crying, exhausted, unsure of how to keep going. That does not mean something is wrong with you. It means you are human and you are in a process that most of us were never taught how to navigate. We are living through a global transition, a dismantling of systems and roles that were never made for our true nature. And maybe you feel it too:

A longing for a different way.
A return to rhythms that feel more human, more cyclical.
More rest. More presence. More authentic connection.
Less noise. Less pressure. Less pretending.

There is no fixed timeline for this kind of healing. There is no checklist or finish line. There is only this moment and the choice to stay close and true to ourselves, even when everything feels uncertain.

You are not wrong for being where you are. This path is not linear, it spirals, deepens, pauses, and begins again. Your pain and feelings make sense. Your pace is allowed. And even in your darkest moments, you are not as alone as you feel.

Trusting the Unfolding

This journey of remembering who you are, beneath the roles, the expectations, the survival strategies is tender and sacred. There is no right way to move through it. Only the invitation to keep listening. To keep choosing what feels true, one breath at a time.

And if all you do today is pause, take a breath, and soften into where you are that is more than enough.

Have you been moving through a transition of your own? I would love to hear how these reflections resonate with you. Feel free to share your thoughts, questions, or simply let me know you are here in the comments below, your presence is deeply welcome.

Here are some questions for reflection, if they resonate:

• What parts of me are asking to be seen or felt right now?

• Where am I trying to "push through" instead of allowing myself to be where I am?

• What does safety feel like in my body and what helps me return to it?

• Is there something I need to grieve, honor, or let go of?

• What does it mean to trust my process in this moment?

If you feel called to be gently supported in this process with compassion, depth and from a trauma-informed and holistic perspective, you are so welcome to reach out. I offer 1:1 and group spaces both online and in-person in Oslo. 💛

With warmth and care,

Julia